Mar. 31st, 2009

i give up

Mar. 31st, 2009 11:19 am
edgarallenfrog: various pics of harvey milk (werk)
I got into the office for another pap smear, coloposcopy, and my once-every-three-months depo shot. Found out that the medicaid office decided to cancel not only the grant that was funding my cancer treatment, but also my plan first which covered my depo, all without telling me. Planned Parenthood, who did NOT have to do this, graciously gave me my depo shot anyway even though I have nothing but flies and moths in my bank account with which to pay them, and they let me fill out paperwork to try to get my Plan First back. They are not as concerned about this as I am. I didn't get to have the coloposcopy to see if the cancer has spread, because the insurance was canceled, but in June we'll find a way to pay for it (Plan First doesn't pay for it). They say they will give me a pap in June, and if the icky cells have spread, they will help me fight to get a coloposcopy and a hysterectomy, "no matter what we have to do to get it."

My ex church cohorts are threatening to picket the "Day of Silence" this year. They sent me this charming link as a reminder that this cancer is my fault (even though I got it when I was raped, I've still had willing sex since then, so God deferred punishment until I decided to turn away from him, or something like that). Also because I hand out condoms to other people so they will have safer sex if they have sex at all. This makes me extra evil. If these people do picket the "Day of Silence," I'll blame myself. Nathan, the president of DSAGA, said when my pastor came to speak at DSAGA that he'd never encountered really violent opposition from Christians. I don't want him to have to see this. I don't want any of them to be attacked because crazy religious nuts have some kind of weird vendetta against anything I'm involved in.

So, to review: I am going to die, I deserve this, and Jesus is going to kick my friend's asses.

I'm having a great day, how are you?

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edgarallenfrog: various pics of harvey milk (Default)
edgarallenfrog

May 2009

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